Facebook Posts That Should Never Have Happened

While some Facebook users have made complete asses of themselves, either through laziness or hubris, it’s important to remember that sometimes it’s Facebook that fails. Imgur user jamoheehoo posted this photo only to discover Facebook had a racist blind spot in its facial recognition. We’re most impressed that facial recognition thought the subject was capable of cloning himself.

Everyone embellishes aspects of their life. Maybe you say you came in second in a high school race or had more dates than you did. The way to sneak a lie past someone is to be clever, so if you’re going to brag about your Grandmother’s military service make sure none of your friends saw her in combat on ABC television.

This modern-day Lott made the crucial mistake of bragging about being under the protection of the almighty. God may appreciate your dedication, but he’s a comedian, and apparently, it was time to test out a new set on this believer’s car. Hopefully, God sent free AAA their way.

No one is more savage than your mother. They say a lawyer should never ask a question in court they don’t know the answer to, but the same can be said for people whose parents are on Facebook. Being embarrassed by a parent is nothing new for most children, but few experience the WWE-level body-slamming from their mom quite like this particular offspring. They’ll be feeling this burn well into Thanksgiving.

As any English major can attest, our society’s refusal to learn the difference between their, there, and they’re is a travesty. Thankfully this little angel has a Mom who is getting her started early. Is it too late to start a GoFundMe for this kid’s teacher?

It’s ironic that this Facebook user quoted Luke 1:37, since that passage recounts the story of Mary being told by an angel that she would immaculately conceive. According to this newly smitten Facebook user, God really comes through. Provided you find a website that lets you complete your order.

This buzzkill isn’t getting any pizza. Everyone faces personal tragedies in life. It’s heartbreaking but universal. The question is what we do when we face these tragedies. Do we take a step back and try to make the world a better place, or do we get online and ruin silly pizza games?

Not everyone can get booked on Maury. When the producers let you down, the ability to tag people on Facebook will always be there for you.

Facebook Marketplace posts seldom represent humanity at its best, but this example (from Florida, of course) really tugs at the heartstrings. Some folks want to sell used DVDs, but this Florida resident is just looking for a friend. This isn’t what Lord Zuckerberg had in mind when the company launched Marketplace, but it’s pretty sweet.

Are you Vegan? You need to be careful preaching on Facebook. Someday you might say something offensive like “Hmmmm yummie, pizza…” on your feed, and open up Pandora’s Box. The first plague… is David.

Oh boy. I think someone needs a lesson on the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.

I think somebody needs a bit of education on what cheating means. Seriously.

Yoooooo. Tell me that is NOT their son. Like for real. Ryan Gosling and Steve Carell have officially had a child together.

Jessica just owned the life of Kristy. Or is Kristy just living her life to the fullest (literally). What do you think?

If you ever feel dumb, just remember that there are apparently people who think the world is 2020 year old.

RMS Titanic was a British passenger liner operated by the White Star Line that sank in the North Atlantic Ocean in the early morning hours of 15 April 1912, after striking an iceberg during her maiden voyage from Southampton to New York City. Of the estimated 2,224 passengers and crew aboard, more than 1,500 died, making the sinking one of modern historys deadliest peacetime commercial marine disasters.

The proudest Mommy moment of all time. Parenting done totally right.

The legend of the epic wingman. Legend says he is still playing the same game.

I can tell that this is going to be a successful marriage. I wish nothing but the best for the two of them and their family.

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